YANKEE DOODLE ON ADVERTISING.

Auckland Examiner, Volume III, Issue 141, 12 March 1859, Page 5 (Supplement)

YANKEE DOODLE ON ADVERTISING.

If a chap was to fall into a well, up to his neck, I kinder reckon he might shiver till be

shook his teeth out without any one coming to his aid, unless he sung out “Murder” or something else, so as to alarm his wife, and bring her to rescue. Just so it is in regard to merchandise. Aman may have his shop full of goods, but if no one knows it, what does it benefit him ? He may have two or three or a dozen local customers, but to fetch a crowd he must call a crowd, and the only way to call’em is to sound the news in that etarnal trumpet —the newspeper, Advertising goods is just like snoriu’ or takin’ a cryin’ baby to church. If you sleep in church and dont’t snore, how’s folks in the back seats or in the gallery to know that you are there ? And in regard to the baby, folks would never know that you could raise one if, when nurse takes him to church, he didn’t begin to let off steam. But when he yells out good and strong, everybody, parson and all, feel mighty good; they look at him and say to. themselves, “Fine baby that, by hokey I a regular young rhinossercrow, by gum” ! The more he bellers, the more people know it, the more people think about you , they read, mark, learn, and inwardly digest what you say, and then they go and see you. One would imagine a chap who never advertises his goods had stole’em somewhere, and was afraid the owder would, as he seen them advertised, come and claim his property; there may be such a thing. A man who is afraid to advertise is afraid to look an honest public in the face, that’s veracity ; and they are just as feerad of him. I’m always suspicious of a chap that has a store full of goods and never spends a cent in making people aware of it; he is either a big fool or a big knave, When such a ’coon is likely enough to get a good customer, he’d ort to take a daggrytipe of him sure, for it aint likely he’ll see him agin iu a hurry ; for you see the man that don’t advertise never sells twice to the same person ; he sells so little that he has to charge like thunder to be able to live. He is so stingy that he would let his baby out to a beggar at a penny a day, and if he ever gave a blind man a cent it would sure to be a bad one. His store smells so musty with his six year old, moth-eaten, fly-specked, old-fashioned goods, that it is enough to knock a negro down to go into it, let alone a lady. You see, goods is like gals ; they must go when they are in the fashion, and good lookin’, or else a yoke of oxen wouldn’t draw’em off afterwards. The man that advertises most does most business, because he don’t make one stock to last one life-time. I know a merchant of this district who has imported three different batches of goods within a year from Europe—and nona of your small schooner loads either, each time —and now he’s nearly sold out again. How does he and his partner get rid ‘of so many goods ? They advertise more than all the others put together, that’s the how; I can prove it. If you want to borrow money—if you want to lend money—if you want a farm to rent—if you have one to sell —advertise. Ifyourhoss, pig, cow, colt, sheep, oxen, or husband go astray, advertise them right off, and not run the cqance of losin' ’em altogether, or havin’ to pay as much as they are worth in charges for their keep. If you are a shoemaker, tailor, blacksmith, waggon maker, or any kind of useful mechanic, show people that you are not ashamed of being a mechanic, by advertising. If you keep an hotel, make it known. When people see a man advertise, they know he’s a business man. The world is full of folks who want. Some want to sell ; some want to buy, and the only way to meet these wants and make money is to advertise. Advertising is like honesty—it pays well if followed up. Merchants think nothing of paying forty dollars for one sign with nothing but their name on it. Well, what do you think of havin’ two thousands signs a week in a newspaper I In it you can show your whole establishment to the country every week. If you are wise, just rub your eyes, and go to work, and advertise. — Yankee Doodle, in Niagara Mail.