MISCELLANEOUS.

Cromwell Argus, Volume V, Issue 251, 1 September 1874, Page 7

MISCELLANEOUS.

A recent medical writer say,B :—" Sleep whenever you can—anywhere when you get a charieei»? the great want of the ageis sleep." This is not" always safe advice -to follow, as one of-our townsmen (says a Canadian contemporary) knows to his. cost. He was re-; cently afflicted with a bad cold, and, to cure himself of it, resorted to the remedy of putting his feet in hot water and drinking a tumblerful of strong whisky, toddy, prescribed by an aged and respected friend of the family. Having got everything in order for carrying out the prescription) he. sat down by the fire, his feet immersed in warm water, and a tumbler of smoking toddy by his side. In this condition a sense of enjoyment stole over him as he sipped the exhilarating liquid, and he fell asleep. His wife had gone to bed, and, on awakening about three o'clock in the morning, wondered ' why she was alone. Going down-stairs - she was-horrified to see her liege lord, asleep in his chair, the fire out, his feet still immersed in the water, over which a cake of ice was forming, and an empty tumbler on the chair beside him. His cold isn't a bit better.

Truth crushed to earth will rise' again, but we have our doubts if John Truth, of Oshkosh, who had a saw-log rolled over on him the other day, will ever gather around' the family hearth-stone and eat green apples again. . .

On the 0, vening train from Albany, recently, was a woman, bound for. Wesifieldy who persisted in requesting the affable conductor to inform her when Chester was reached. Every time when the conductor passed through the car he was greeted with, "Please tell me when we get to Chester." Courteous man though he is, even his patience was finally exhausted, and he politely requested the unfortunate female to maintain silence, as he had heard and would bear in mind her injunction. Chester was finally reached; and " Chester" was yelled at the car door. ■ The train again started, and the conductor entered the car in which was his persecutor. " Will .you tell me when we get to Chester?" she said. " This is Chester," he exclaimed, and grasping the bell-rope, he had the train backed up to the station. "I'm real glad you obliged me," said this daughter of Eve to the exasperated conductor ; and comfortably settling herself for a further journey on the train, she coolly added, "My husband used to live here."

A Lord Mayor who Couldn't Dakce.— The Lord Mayor's Ball was a funny affair. I do not refer to the artificial evergreens, to twining ivy fastened round the pillars with wire, the paper roses, and the painted lilies. The people afforded all the fun the heart could wish, and with all reverence be it spoken, the Lord Mayor himself, gorgeous n Oouit dress and chain of office, made every <ne laugh more than aught besides. For ibon the Lord Mayor, as host, devolved the tak of leading off the Duchess of Edinburgh in-he first quadrille, and here was the place whin, as poor Artemus Ward said, "the lafturtcame in." Lord Mavor Lusk is a politician >f no mean order. He can make a good apeeci. •He represents Finsbury right worthly in the House of Commons. He ia altogeher a notable man. But he cannot dance. <He has not, in fact, the slightest notion of performing the least possible flourish nth. what ia known as the "light fantastic toe?' and hence it came to pass that he cut so sory a spectacle when the movement commence! as to make the heart of any loyal citixen qm e sorrowful. The Duchess of Edinburgh \id the best she could with him, but the the City was nowhere, right, and did not Wirae his dignified appearance till the waltz r as over, and he took his place at the head of\h.e supper table, where, to tell the truth, he so me d quite at home.— Loudon Correspondent.