IS MARRIAGE A FAILURE?

Gisborne Times, Volume XXV, Issue 2105, 13 June 1907, Page 4

IS MARRIAGE A FAILURE?

A CRUSTY BACHELOR’S .VIEWS.

SOME PERTINENT QUESTIONS

People of all kinds havo givon .their viows on this question, so tlio following romarks by “Old Bachelor” should complotoly olucidato tho whole matter:

Tho controversy which is raging in your columns as to whotlior “Marriago is a Failure” induces one who has always accoptod tlio oxisting state of affairs as a matter of courso, to ask why tho nocossity for tho question has arison. Does love play a less important part in matrimonial allianco than it used to do ? havo our women a lower standard of morality ? or loss regard for tho womanly purity which has always boon our pridoP and havo mon developed indifforonco and infidelty to tho marriage contract? I fancy that tho tliroo questions boar strongly upon ono another, and am reluctantly forced to tho conclusion that all those questions must bo answorod in tho affirmative. In a largo porcontago of cases it sooms to us that girls drivon, *f you will, by the forco of circumstances and tho prosont stato of society aro propared to marry any man who offers himself —unless ho is absolutely ropugnant—who is in a postion to offer them a good homo according to their standard of living. They do not trouble to ascertain tho tompoiamont, tho ambitions, or tho tastes of thoir intended husband; it is immaterial if they aro tho very antithesis of their own, so long as he can provide tho homo. Parents frequently encourage them in this viow and sell thoir daughters for tho price, but later both awaken to the fact that they havo oaten Doad Sea fruit. Does this load to connubial bliss? Am I gotting old, or am I old-fa-sliionod, sir, that I fancy tho standard of morality among our women is lower than it used to be ? I fancy I must be, for I still bolievo that onshrined in every refined and true man’s heart is the vision of an ideal, tho vision of a woman of ineffable swoetnoss and purity, a Madonna, and it is the nearest resemblance to that ideal he seeks to be mother of his children. He desires not only to protect, but to worship. Do tho majority of the girls wo meet nowadays answer this description ? I dare not answer!

Man is by naturo lax with regard to morals, however strong his character may be in some respects. Indeed, it may bo doubted whether ho is a manly man if he has not this taint, yet if he meets his Ideal, tho influence of purity causes his better nature to re-assert itself with no palpable effort. Is fidelity in the average man encouraged by this influence of his wife, or is his ideal dashed from the pedestal by glimpses ho gets of loose and meretricious conversations, scandals, malice, and uncharitableness and contempt for the marital bonds engendered thereby? I fear in many cases it is tho latter.