HOW TO MAKE YOUR WIFE

Gisborne Times, Volume XXVII, Issue 2419, 6 February 1909, Page 12 (Supplement)

HOW TO MAKE YOUR WIFE

HAPPY. EVERY MARRIED MAN SHOULD READ THIS. I liavo performed the feat, so I know all about it. Tlie art of making a wife happy is as simple and natural “as winking;” and why so many husbands fail in mastering it is to me one of tlio inscrutable problems of life, .If men would only bring to bear on it -a fraction of tlio consideration and common-sense which they practise in tlioir relations with t)ho world and I’ll their (business life, neglected and ughappy wi-ves would soon be as -difficult to find as the North Pole.

“It really takes -so llittle to -make a wife liap-py,” said my -wife to- mo, “that, to a right-minded-woman, any effort on her husband’s -part to do- so, however blundering and misguideu. cannot fail to accomplish its-purpose.” And in this the -wliole secret lies. It is tlie wish that is all-important in a woman’s eyes, and unfortunately it is this that -so many husbands lack. TOO OFTEN TRUE.

When once, the prize is secured and the glamour of honeymoon -clays is over, the ardour of pursuit so often gives place to the indifference of possession, tlie fire of passion has burnt itself out, and the hearth that should warm and brighten the wedded life is cold. On our wedding-day my wife -and- [ took two mutual vows (1) to keep up through our wedded life the _ illusion (if such it be) o-f our courting days; and (2) to avoid the first quarrel. The first vow I found easier to keep than t-lio second, for, so far from love ending at the all tar, it seemed in our case to grow stronger every day of our life together; and where love is it is always seeking expression in a thousand Little ways that minister to the pleasure and comfort of the loved one. THE MORNING KISS.

There is, for instance., a magic in the morning kiss at parting that gilds the whoiffPday for the home-staying wife; and it is so little to'-ask and so cruel to refuse. During the twenty years of our wedded life I have always made a point of taking Ihome some small thing to show my wife that she has been in my thoughts during the. day—as she always -is. A few flowers, a paper, a new song—such trivialities as these, but each a source of delight to giver and receiver.

BRIGHT EVENINGS AT HOME. Knowing how duel the long hours of my -absence' must be to my wife. U have always considered that my evenings were hers to enioy as she willed ; and how sweet they have -been we know. To add to our pleasure we have cultivated the. same hobbies —music, photography, games, and so on —and thus no hour is without its occupation which we can share and enjoy together. In these wavs, and by the thousand little attentions and ministrations which made our days of wooing one long delight, our wedded life has been, if possible, still more happy. To put the matter briefly, 1 have made my wife's happiness my hobby, and it has.proved the best hobbv -aiiy man can take up. AVOIDING FIRST QUARREL. The avoidance of the first dispute was not, for some time, quite, so easy. But realising that “every little thing can blast an infant -blossom, ’ each ol ns was on constant guard against .the very aopearance of a misunderstanding. It is a true saying that it takes two to make, a- quarrel, and we have so arranged- that iso. 2. was never willing. Of course., at times, it -has required an effort, but now wcli tlio effort was worth milking. There are few .greater menaces to married happiness than a wife s fceliiirr of dcpcmle-ndence on her husband iumuonev matters. In order to avoid this pitfall in our case. I have always proportioned any income so that oui expenditure does not clash. At the beginning of each -month 1 hand ove.i to my wife a certain sum -which is ample for all her purposes, and so skiff nil.v has she managed- things that not only has she never had to -ask me for a penny, but she has put by quite a substantial sum, as she says, ioi a AVOMEN I HAiRD TO UNDERSTAND. . Very early in our life 1 made the discovery, which , all bands make sooner ox Jatei, that tliei c are moods and actions o .A -ff. . which, to a man, -are unintelligible, and I determined that 1 would not even attempt to fathom them. To my mind the constant and Li til efforts of husbands to exact from their wives the same standai d of i tive and conduct that they observe are among the most frequent causes of married misery. The thing cannot be done.; and the wise man is no who recognises this. To me these feminine mo-ods, which “no fellow can understand,” /have Hong become the cause, for sympathy and not of perplexity and annoyance. For the rest— and I could write reams on this subject—my wife and 1 have always made it a rule to have no secrets from each other; to share oui perplexities and troubles as we snare our joys; never to criticise each other before.'others; and never to contradict each other in the -presence ot our children. REFLECTIONS. And what we have made of our married-life, others may easily make of theirs. It is no Utopian programme I have sketched; nor are my wile and I in any way different or superior to the average wedded. . couple. What may seem difficult, with conscientious effort becomes a habit, as happy in its effect as it is easy m practice. And even if perfect success cannot be achieved, the. measure of resultant happiness that is within the reach of all who try is sufficient to revolutionise wedded life and to make it, as it was designed to be, a sweet and sacred thing. •_

REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR GIRL, (By .Helen -Rowland.) •Jack -and Jill went up the. hill—the bill of matrimony. J ack ifoU down with an awful splash —and Jill got alimony. •According to divorce records, the worst dangers and pitfalls of Wall street all have yellow hair and run a typo writer. . • Marriage is something like a.fashionable p-iuk tea; everybody inside is bored to death and longing to get out land everybody outside is curious and anxious to get in. ' No man was ever such a bitter woman liater that ho could pass right by a hosiery shop without glancing m the window.

No, my dear, don’t expect a man to propose on his knees, because ~u-these these busy times he is much more likely .to propose on a windy street corner, or k>ii the way to 'lunch or just on the. off-chance that you may refuse him. f A ..... You can got so close to a- beautirui painting that it will look just likt a smudge, and a husband can get so close to a wife that she wall look just like a blot on life. Be very firm in telling a man that he mustn’t make, llovo to you—t-lpit is, if you -are really anxious, to have hi “ SiVri Si.ot totVr .to «ultivate the art of conversation in order to be fascinating. Her mone> will do the talking. A man never wants champagne -a second time from the same bottlenor love -again from the same gnl. Nowadays -a man’s. 'Merest m a girl is usually the kind that yields It NuT* their arguments and quarrols but those long silences "hen husband and wife can’t think of an>thing to say to one anothei that makes niprricd life so dreary- , , Alanv a club lias all the comloits of a home, but where is the man who will acknowledge that home has all the comforts of a club ? , AY hen a married man reads mon’s many wives, be sn '°' ) L • ‘ doubts that pnilosophei :■> gi dom after all. - , + ,- n Funny how a man wlio.wdl spend * . n hours of patient toil trying to Imd.oM what is the matter with his .! action.. auto-car won’t spend two minutes try - i„cr to discover what n the mattei with his fractious wife. There are no regular mles 101 M’.' ling nowadays; what a man calls Ms correspondents, for instance his wife so often calls his co-respondent. AVhat with Oriental rugs, co-.s eoi ners and joss-sticks, the* uphomo is becoming us miicn. Jii'- * Turkish harem as virtue, resp*C'abilitv and your husband s salaiy " ■ P °bToocl will tell.; and its your own blood-relations who usually tell your husband of all the little failings of vours which lie might otherwise nevoi have discovered. The nicest tiling about being a "Kl<vwJs that yon can chaperone yourscll while- you flirt.