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Last year in the neighborhood of Algiers, eggs representing four hundred thousand millions of crickets were destroyed. Ten thousand soldiers and a greater number of civilians were engaged in the work of destruction. Tell us not in spoony verses Married life is all a dream ; He who oft his joy rehearses Is not glad as he may seem. Heads of all bald men remind us We should choose our wives with care ; Or departing leave behind us Half our natural crop of hair. The following curious incident recently took place in the Leicester County Court. The claim was for 14s. for a book purchased by the defendant prior to his bankruptcy ; but the debt was not proved, and the defendant has since promised to pay, as he had given the book away as a present. The plaintiff said he had applied for the money, but the defendant had returned his letter, with the words “Go to Hell ” written across it. •• So, ” said the plaintiff, “ I came here.” Judge: “AmlSatan.tbeu?” Witness: “Oh, dear no.” (Laughter.) The Judge then gave judgment for the defendant, but expressed his opinion that the defendant should in honor pay the debt. Witness: “Do I understand that your Honor gives judgmentforthedefendant?” Judge: "Yes.” Witness : “ Then I can calmly say with the psalmist David, ‘ One day in thy Courts is better than a thousand.’ I have been here from ten to five.”

Professor Sehwenninger owes his post as the permanent doctor of Prince Bismarck to his extremely frank fidelity. He is a second Abernethy in the brusquenese with which he treats his patients. The great statesman was plagued for years by his incurable nervous excitement and his ever-recurring gout, though it permitted him to eat well, drink well, work prodigiously and smoke amazingly. No doctor could help him until he had the good fortune to get into tbe hands of the Bavarian professor, the only man, it is said, who has ever bad power enough over Bismarck to compel him to obey. At his first visit Dr Sobwenninger found the patient in his gloomiest and most hopeless mood. The physician began to catechise tbe Chancellor about his past life. “ That is no matter of yours, ’ said Bismarck; ■' I want you to deal with my present condition.” “ If that is tho case,” said the bold Bavarian, “ you had better send for a cattle doctor ho would not be in the habit of putting questions to his patients.” He took up his hat and made for the door. But Bismarck, suddenly laughing in tho midst of his groanI ings, laid hold of the independent doctor, and ] said, ” I believe after all, you are my man,” I He has never lost faith in ths doctor from I that day till now. He is such a model of I docility and compliance towards this one ■ man that there may be some excuse for the f notion that Dr. Bohwenninger must have I hypnotized him.

Permanent link to this item
Hononga pūmau ki tēnei tūemi

https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/GSCCG18900701.2.16

Bibliographic details
Ngā taipitopito pukapuka

Gisborne Standard and Cook County Gazette, Volume IV, Issue 474, 1 July 1890, Page 3

Word count
Tapeke kupu
492

Untitled Gisborne Standard and Cook County Gazette, Volume IV, Issue 474, 1 July 1890, Page 3

Untitled Gisborne Standard and Cook County Gazette, Volume IV, Issue 474, 1 July 1890, Page 3

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