Page 16 Advertisements Column 3

Digger (Invercargill RSA), Issue 14, 18 June 1920, Page 16

SHORT STQR1ES. AFFECTION ATE. "Oh, papa, come round the corner quick Brother Bill's there with a dog that's awfully attached to him," said Willie, breathless with excitement. Father: "No cause for excitement in that, my boy," said papa, in liis cairn, superior way. "The attachment of dumb animals to those who are kind to them is one of their most beautiful traits." "Well, this one is attached all right. We've been trying for two hours to pry him loose with a etick, and ma's poured two lcettlefuis of hot water on him, and he's still attached!" THOSE IRISH. "But, Pat, are you sure you love her?" "Shure, is it? B,e hivins, Oi can't slape for dramin about her." PA DIDN'T ANSW7ER. Little Billie: Say, pa!" Pa: "Well, whai is it, my ison?" Little Billie : "Will my hair fall out when it gets ripe, like yours did?" THE INDIGATION. Angler : "How do you know the good places ,to fish in this stream. Wangler : "0'h, I walk along until I find a place where there are a lot of empty botties scattered about." HIS DESERTS. Box : "You're looking rather tired." Cox : "Yes, I've been troubled with insomnia lately. " Box : "You don't say so. Boy or girl?" HE MEANT BUSINESS. Editor : "Going to sue us for damagee ?" Indignant Caller : "Yes. I sent you a poern entitled, 'My Life is a Useless Burden,' and you printed 'wife' instead of 'life,'- and published it in my name. Then my wife saw it. And I want damages. And I'U get 'em, too!" RATHER AWKWARD. "Our new company is capitalised at forty thousand pounds." "That's good! Let me see your prospect us." "Oh, we havn't got a prospectus yet. The — er — -the printer wants his cheque •in advance. " NOT QUITE SURE. Reggie : "I suppose the leading lady is very happy after getting all those bouquets?" Attendant : "Oh, no. She only got five. ' Reggie: "Gracious ! Isn't that enough ?' Attendant: "No; she paid for six, ;I believe." UNDOUBTEDLY. Visitor: "Well, my little naan, how old are yon ?" Johnnie : "Five." Visitor: "And what are you going to be ?" Johnnie : "Six." HE COULDN'T UNDERSTAND. Mother : "Willie I'm surprised at you! W7illie : "I wonder when you'U get used to me, mamma. You're always surprised at me, yet I've always been with you. SEA BREEZES. "Did you have a good passage?" was asked of a recent traveller. "Fair: but I couldn't sleep. The first three nights I couldn't t-ell whether to shut the porthole and go to bed, or to close the bed and go to the porthole. And the last three I spent in reading the Customs regulations. ' '

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