CONTRIBUTED VERSES

Gisborne Times, Volume XXVII, Issue 2610, 18 September 1909, Page 4 (Supplement)

CONTRIBUTED VERSES

A WONDERFUL EXPEDITION. This is a tale, told with poor eur’dition, Of a marvellous Not tit Pole expedition ; Sent on its .way ■ with great/ecJ'at, The wonderful (northern egg to hatch.

The many wise-acres of Loudon Town Decided that they would gain renown By sending poor beggars to solve the prob., And. trying the Pole from/ the North to rob. They started by getting a grant from the Gov., Merely to give the matter a shove; Then worried the public like a* bo re Till they managed toi get ’nough spoils —and more. The dibs collected they looked for a ship, Like, taking a hand in a ha’penny dip— Yes, it cost much money, patience, and time, ✓ Before they found the “Timothy Lime.” Now the “Timothy Lime” was an ugly tub, Built like a barge—or .a toper’s mug. But she looked very taut and mighty strong, gind would stand a lot of knocking along. They fitted her out at endless expense, Until she certainly looked immense; With tar and paint, and lots of rope, She doubtless held their fondest hope. The Committee then' asked Captain Portheus Olde, For he was a mariner brave and bold, To skip par .a crew and the “Timothy “Lime,” Away to the cold and northern clime. The captain and crew were feted and fed, And all suffered freely from very large head, For were they not the nation’s just pride, Being sent to the North on the Polo to ride. The ship at last east loose from the shore, Leaving sweethearts and wives with much furore — The waving of flags and the firing of guns, And the uniform thanks of the greatest ones. The “Timothy Lime” was a godless tub. She wallowed and jumped like a fly in a mug, Till captain and crew did nought but swear, And felt like returning then and there. The north wind blew o'er the ice-fields cold, Causing many <a mariner brave and bold To shiver and say with many a rnort “Gol darn this wind from the breezy north.” But the wind kept on, and blew and blew, Whilst the curlews shrieked as they boldly flew, Through the drifting scud cf the northern wrack ’Hove many an iceberg tightly packed. The “Timothy Lime” steamed up from the south, Like an argonaut with a belching mouth, Puff puff, clang -clang, with clatter she came, Bent on winning immortal fame. She felt that ‘wind, and her seamen bold, All huddled together to keep out the co Yd, Said, “If this is a foretaste of .what's to arrive, “We do not see much chance to survive.” ■£» Captain Portheus Olde cursed Ins men with a .will—’T’was the only warmth he could then instil — He called them lubbers grad lazy hunks, JvLt fit to lav like piss in their bunks. “Cold you are? Then I’ll soon make vou 'hot, “By the piper that .played thro’ Hamlin cot.” He picked up a marlin-spike, set to work And hustled? them up like a bustling Turk. They reached the ice-pack and landed there, to bravely do and dare; Landed provisions and built a hut. And generally prepared, for .the ice to shut. Sledges were made, about a re ore. Though this they found a horrible bore. For shortly did'Captain Portheufc Old* Intend to' attack King Cold’s stronghold. The voarty walked, and slid, and tumbled, \s over .the ice they laboriously rumbled. For days and nights they wearily travelled That the mighty question might be unravelled. For twelve long days and twelve long nights, After sundry adventures and many fights, With the fierce white bear and the lordly seal, These seamen found that the Pole was real. “Hullo.” they cried, “’tis thc ! jolly cld pole,

With the end of it stuck in. a deep-ice-hole.” They pulled it out and prepared fc/ flight Back to the ship, while there yet wan light. After falling and stumbling a hundred times, They managed to reach the “Timothy Lime,” And loaded their burden, the -great North Pole— Alas, never more to repose in its hole. Back to the ship and their back home, Like a- deg who has managed to snavvle a bone. Went Captain Olde and his crew so bold, Prepared to prove they had not been sold. The news flew fast, though the ship sailed slow. For the “Timothy Lime” was not built

to go, -And the ships of England—a very large fleet— Were sent Captain Olde* and his crow to meet. Hustle, and bustle, and jcstle, and swear. The multitudes turned out in* force to the square, To welcome the crew of the “Timothy Lime,” And give them all round a jelly good time. “A speech, a speech,” the people cried, Nor would they in any way be denied; And after many a. bustle and shove, Captain Portheus Olde appeared above. “Citizens all of this somewhat largo town, “I thank yon much—but don’t want a crown; “My men and I have brought you the pole “Which we wore sent to pull from its hole. “It’s not much to look at, for ’tis a bit worn “Without doubt of its ancient glory been shorn; “But fucli as it is we brought it along, “And now to this city it does belong. “It .looks like oak, bnt it may be yew, “Such ats it is it belongs to you. “Take it and do with it just as you please, “For trying to get it we all did a freeze’.” Captain Portheus Okie- then got him down, And .swore he had gained enough renown, At home he .would in the future stop. Content to abide in h little shop. I’ENVOI. This i- the story of how the Pole Was plucked in the North from out of its hole. And was borne by the crew cf the “Timothy Lime.” To -a home in a. warmer and sunnier clime. —J. C. E. Turner.